I'm Obviously Younger, Much Better Looking [then

Facts Matter Not At All. Perception Is Everything. It's Certainty.

Wikipedia Is The First Place I Go When I'm Looking For Knowledge... Or When I Want To Create Some.

Jesus Forgives Sinners, Not Criminals.

I Just Think Rosa Parks Was Overrated. Last Time I Checked, She Got Famous For Breaking The Law.

Every Night On My Show, The Colbert Report, I Speak Straight From The Gut, Okay? I Give People The Truth, Unfiltered By Rational Argument. I Call It "the No Fact Zone.