I Like My Cinema Gritty, I Like

Today Is Veterans Day. Thank You To All Our Men And Women Who Have Served The United States Armed Forces. In Honor Of Veterans Day We Are Marching Out A Few Jokes That Have Already Served.

Privately I Think That I'm Not Really Somebody Who Has A Network Television Show. Celebrities Are Other People - Johnny Carson And Sylvester Stallone. I'm Just A Kid Trying To Make A Living Is The Way I Feel.

Here's A Woman, A Real Pioneer For Other Women Looking For Careers In Stand-up Comedy. And Talk About Guts - She Would Come Out Here And Sit In This Chair And Say Some Things That Were Unbelievable - Where You Would Have To Swallow Pretty Hard... But It Was Hilarious... The Force Of Her Comedy Was Overpowering.

John Kerry Went Duck Hunting And He's Doing That To Fulfill His Campaign Pledge To Hunt Down The Ducks And Kill Them Wherever They Are! Kerry Did Pretty Well; He Came Back With Four Ducks And Three Purple Hearts.

I Knew That If I Woke Up Hung Over, I Couldn't Do The Best Possible Job On The Show, So I Had To Quit. Also, I'd Consumed A Lot Of Beer For A Lot Of Years, And I Thought, That's Enough. I've Had My Fun And I'm Glad I Quit.