I Like Being Full, Every Day, With

You Can Do Eight Things. We Got It Down To Eight For You.

I Did A Show In New Jersey In The Auditorium Of A Technical High School ... Technical High School, That's Where Dreams Are Narrowed Down. We Tell Our Children, "you Can Do Anything You Want." Their Whole Lives. "you Can Do Anything!" But This Place, We Take Kids - They're 15, They're Young - And We Tell Them, "you Can Do Eight Things. We Got It Down To Eight For You."

I've Always Got The Road. Stand-up Makes You So Autonomous And Self-sufficient That It Really Helps With That Part Of Show Business.

Give A Man A Fish And You Feed Him For A Day. Teach A Man To Fish And You Feed Him For A Lifetime. Leave The Dude Alone And He'll Figure It Out.

When I Got Divorced, I Thought 'well, There Goes My Act.'