Hugs Are Great, But - Better Than

When I Black Out, It's The Happiest Time Of My Life.

In Hollywood, There Is Another Name For A Woman's 40th Birthday Party, It's A Retirement Party.

Don't Do Drugs To Be Cool, Do 'em Because You Hate Yourself.

I've Never Been Swimming, And That's Because It's Never Been More Than Half An Hour Since I Last Ate.

I Have Gay Friends, I Support Gay Rights, I Have Nothing Against The Gay Community, But When I See Two Guys Kissing, I Think It's Gross. And, By The Way, It's Gross When 99% Of Straight People Do It, Too.