Background Image
Halloween Was Confusing. All My Life My Parents Said, "never Take Candy From Strangers." And Then They Dressed Me Up And Said, "go Beg For It." I Didn't Know What To Do. I'd Knock On People's Doors And Go, "trick Or Treat."
-Rita Rudner
Please Wait....
Translating....

Halloween Was Confusing. All My Life My

Rita Rudner
Halloween Was Confusing. All My Life My Parents Said, "never Take Candy From Strangers." And Then They Dressed Me Up And Said, "go Beg For It." I Didn't Know What To Do. I'd Knock On People's Doors And Go, "trick Or Treat."
Views: 3
Topic
Halloween
Doors
People
More From Rita Rudner
Individuality In Dressing Is Not Important To Men. If They All Look Alike It Means They Haven't Made A Mistake.
Mistake
Mean
Men
Envy The Kangaroo. That Pouch Setup Is Extraordinary; The Baby Crawls Out Of The Womb When It Is About Two Inches Long, Gets Into The Pouch, And Proceeds To Mature. I'd Have A Baby If It Would Develop In My Handbag.
Baby
Pregnancy
Two
I Get A Lot Of Return Business. I Think It's All Those Years I Put In Traveling Around The Country; People Saw Me Before And Had A Good Time So They Want To See Me Again.
Country
Thinking
Years
Los Angeles Is A Very Transient Town. It's The Only Place I Know Where You Can Actually Rent A Dog.
Dog
Towns
Los Angeles
The Way A Man Looks At Himself In A Mirror Will Tell You If He Can Ever Care About Anyone Else.
Funny
Humor
Men
Trending Author
Joan Miro
James Buchan
Henry Mintzberg
Orville Redenbacher
William Cowper
B. B. King
Quotes by Topics
Action Attention Believe Blessing Desire Dream Ends Fear Fun God Grief Hard Work Hate Life Leave Me Alone Men Mind Moving Opportunity Philosophy Positive Religious Strong Thinking Want
Category