For Almost Ninety Years I’ve Walked Among

Your Number Was Up The First Time I Met You.

No, Actually 'the Host' Was Totally A Palate-cleanser For Me. I Wanted To Do Something A Little Bit Different Than Romantic Love. Romantic Love Is In There, Obviously, Because I Enjoy Writing About That And Living It A Lot.

Why Didn't I Just Walk Away? Oh Right, Because I'm A Idiot.

Silently, I Lifted My Doggy Bowl Off The Floor. Then, With A Quick, Powerful Flip Of My Wrist, I Threw It Into The Back Of Blondie’s Head So Hard That – With An Earsplitting Bang – It Smashed Flat Before It Ricocheted Across The Room And Snapped The Round Top Piece Off The Thick Newel Post At The Foot Of The Stairs.

It Was Nice To Be Alone, Not To Have To Smile And Look Pleased; A Relief To Stare Dejectedly Out The Window At The Sheeting Rain And Let Just A Few Tears Escape.