Childbirth, As A Strictly Physical Phenomenon, Is

If Mozart Had Power Tools, There's No Telling How Great His Music Might Have Been.

Most Recently I Read Michael Lewis "boomerang." The Other Guy I Love Is Bill Bryson.

Babies Are Equipped At Birth With A Number Of Instinctive Reflexes And Behavior Patterns That Cause Them To Spend Their First Several Years Trying To Kill Themselves. If Your Home Contains A Sharp, Toxic Object, Your Baby Will Locate It; If Your Home Contains No Such Object, Your Baby Will Try To Obtain One Via Mail Order.

Scientists Now Believe That The Primary Biological Function Of Breasts Is To Make Males Stupid.

The Soviet Union At This Time Was Being Run By The Communists, A Group Of Men Fierce In Their Dedication To Wearing Hilariously Bad Suits. Their Leader Was Josef Stalin (russian For "joey Bananas")