List of Demetri Martin Quotes

I'm Very Hip-oriented. I Focus On Hips In My Comedy - Probably More Than Any Other Hipster Comic Who Is Out There Hipping Today. My Hips, Other Hips. I Work With My Hips A Great Deal. That Is What I Do. But Not In A Gay Way.

My Family Was Fine, It's Just A Different Way Of Going About Life. Creativity Was Not Something That Was Isolated And Identified And Valued.

I Don't Know If I'll Ever Be A Master At Anything, But I Think That's A Mistake For Me Personally. I Don't Know How Much It's About The Journey, But It's More About The Process.

For Me, Possibility, Progress, Growth, Those Things Are Very.. They Feel Very Good. It Doesn't Usually Come With Negativity. I Don't Really Mind Sucking At Something As Long As I'm Getting A Little Bit Better At It Along The Way.

Usually My Favorite Joke Is Whichever Joke I Most Recently Came Up With That Surprised Me The First Time I Thought Of It.

If I Think Of A Joke That's Really Dirty And I Think It's Funny I'll Try It But What I've Found Over The Years Is They Just Don't Laugh. It Doesn't Work Coming Out Of My Mouth So It's Like They Taught Me 'don't Do That. Don't Go That Way Or You'll Lose Me.'

When I Dropped Out [from A Law School], Everybody Was Disappointed... But I Found That Disappointing People Is A Good Thing, Because Disapproval Is Freedom. Before That, I Never Realized How Much I Sought Other People's Approval. Once I Figured That Out, I Was Free To Move On And Seek The Approval Of Other People, In Comedy Clubs And Showbiz Meetings.

I Think As A Performer, It Can Be Really Great To Stand On Stage, Especially When You Have More Time, But I Do Think About The Specific People In The Audience, How It's Hard For Them To Get Up And Go To The Bathroom, How They Chose Not To Do Other Things That Night And Have Turned Off Their Phones And Everything. So For That Reason, I Think It's Necessary To Mix It Up And Talk To The Audience.

I Love Buster Keaton And I Love Physical Comedy When It's Done In An Emotionally Understated Way. I Just Like To Play It, And I Need The Attention.

In Retrospect, Everything Is Finite, But Prospectively, There Are Infinite Possibilities. I Guess That's What Makes Life Hopeful.

I Just Started Doing This One-man Show, And I Wanted To Be Able To Score It, So I Bought A Guitar, And Got A Keyboard And Got A Harmonica. I Remember When I Started That I Didn't Understand Why A Harmonica Had Different Letters On Them.

Some Of Them Relate To Farts But They Are Not Fart Jokes. They Would Just Be A Fart In The Joke But It's About Something Else.